Screenplay Edit: “Lincoln”

A line-by-line edit of the first 272 words of the script.

Screenshot by the author; © 2012 by DreamWorks Pictures and Twentieth Century Fox.

Original Text

EXT. BATTLEFIELD, JENKINS’ FERRY, ARKANSAS - DAYHeavy grey skies hang over a flooded field, the water two feet deep. Cannons and carts, half-submerged and tilted, their wheels trapped in the mud below the surface, are still yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.A terrible battle is taking place; two infantry companies, Negro Union soldiers and white Confederate soldiers, knee- deep in the water, staggering because of the mud beneath, fight each other hand-to-hand, with rifles, bayonets, pistols, knives and fists. There’s no discipline or strategy, nothing depersonalized: it’s mayhem and each side intensely hates the other. Both have resolved to take no prisoners.HAROLD GREEN (V.O.)
Some of us was in the Second Kansas Colored. We fought the rebs at Jenkins’ Ferry last April, just after they’d killed every Negro soldier they captured at Poison Springs.
EXT. PARADE GROUNDS ADJACENT TO THE WASHINGTON NAVY YARD, ANACOSTIA RIVER - NIGHTRain and fog. Union Army companies are camped out across the grounds. Preparations are being made for the impending assault on the Confederate port of Wilmington, North Carolina.Two black soldiers stand before a bivouacked Negro unit: HAROLD GREEN, an infantryman in his late thirties, and IRA CLARK, a cavalryman in his early twenties. ABRAHAM LINCOLN sits on a bench facing Harold and Ira; his stovepipe hat is at his side.HAROLD GREEN
So at Jenkins’ Ferry, we decided warn’t taking no reb prisoners. And we didn’t leave a one of ‘em alive. The ones of us that didn’t die that day, we joined up with the 116th U.S. Colored, sir. From Camp Nelson Kentucky.
LINCOLN
What’s your name, soldier?

Line Edit

EXT. BATTLEFIELD, JENKINS’ FERRY, ARKANSAS - DAY

EXT. JENKINS’ FERRY, ARKANSAS — DAY

Heavy grey skies hang over a flooded field, the water two feet deep.

Heavy gray skies hang over a flooded field, the water two feet deep.

Heavy gray skies hang over a field flooded with water. The water is two feet deep.

Heavy gray skies hang over a field flooded with two feet of water.

Cannons and carts, half-submerged and tilted, their wheels trapped in the mud below the surface, are still yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.

Cannons and carts, half-submerged, their wheels trapped in the mud below the surface, are still yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.

Cannons and carts, half-submerged, their wheels trapped in mud beneath the surface, are yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.

Cannons and carts, half-submerged, their wheels trapped in mud, are yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.

A terrible battle is taking place; two infantry companies, Negro Union soldiers and white Confederate soldiers, knee- deep in the water, staggering because of the mud beneath, fight each other hand-to-hand, with rifles, bayonets, pistols, knives and fists.

A terrible battle is taking place; two infantry companies Negro Union soldiers and White Confederate soldiers, knee-deep in the water, staggering because of the mud beneath fight each other hand-to-hand, with rifles, bayonets, pistols, knives, and fists.

A terrible battle is taking place; two infantry companies — Negro Union soldiers and White Confederate soldiers, both knee-deep in the water and staggering in the mud — fight each other in close quarters.

There’s no discipline or strategy, nothing depersonalized: it’s mayhem and each side intensely hates the other.

There’s no discipline or strategy, no depersonalization: it’s mayhem and each side hates the other.

There’s no discipline or strategy, no depersonalization; it’s mayhem, and each side hates the other.

There’s no discipline or strategy; it’s mayhem, and each side hates the other.

Both have resolved to take no prisoners.

There’s no discipline or strategy; it’s mayhem, and each side hates the other, both resolved to take no prisoners.

HAROLD GREEN (V.O.)Some of us was in the Second Kansas Colored.We fought the rebs at Jenkins’ Ferry last April, just after they’d killed every Negro soldier they captured at Poison Springs.

We fought the Rebs at Jenkins’ Ferry last April, just after they’d killed every Negro soldier they captured at Poison Springs.

EXT. PARADE GROUNDS ADJACENT TO THE WASHINGTON NAVY YARD, ANACOSTIA RIVER - NIGHT

EXT. ANACOSTIA RIVER PARADE GROUNDS ADJACENT TO THE WASHINGTON NAVY YARD — NIGHT

Rain and fog.

EXT. ANACOSTIA RIVER — PARADE GROUNDS ADJACENT TO THE WASHINGTON NAVY YARD — NIGHT (RAINING AND FOGGING)

Union Army companies are camped out across the grounds.

Union Army companies are camped across the grounds.

Preparations are being made for the impending assault on the Confederate port of Wilmington, North Carolina.

Union Army companies are camped across the grounds, preparing for the impending assault on the Confederate port of Wilmington, North Carolina.

Two black soldiers stand before a bivouacked Negro unit: HAROLD GREEN, an infantryman in his late thirties, and IRA CLARK, a cavalryman in his early twenties.

Two Black soldiers — HAROLD GREEN, an infantryman in his late thirties, and IRA CLARK, a cavalryman in his early twenties — are standing before a bivouacked Negro unit.

ABRAHAM LINCOLN sits on a bench facing Harold and Ira; his stovepipe hat is at his side.

ABRAHAM LINCOLN is sitting on a bench, facing Harold and Ira; his stovepipe hat is at his side.

HAROLD GREEN

HAROLD GREEN (CONT’D)

So at Jenkins’ Ferry, we decided warn’t taking no reb prisoners.

So at Jenkins’ Ferry, we decided warn’t takin no Reb prisoners.

And we didn’t leave a one of ‘em alive.

So at Jenkins’ Ferry, we decided warn’t takin’ no Reb prisoners, and we didn’t leave a one of ’em alive.

The ones of us that didn’t die that day, we joined up with the 116th U.S. Colored, sir.

Ones of us didn’t die that day, we joined up with the One Hundred Sixteenth U.S. Colored, sir.

From Camp Nelson Kentucky.

Ones of us didn’t die that day, we joined up with the One Hundred Sixteenth U.S. Colored, sir, from Camp Nelson, Kentucky.

LINCOLN

ABRAHAM LINCOLN

What’s your name, soldier?

Edited Text

EXT. JENKINS’ FERRY, ARKANSAS — DAYHeavy gray skies hang over a field flooded with two feet of water. Cannons and carts, half-submerged, their wheels trapped in mud, are yoked to dead and dying horses and oxen.A terrible battle is taking place; two infantry companies Negro Union soldiers and White Confederate soldiers, both knee-deep in the water and staggering in the mud fight each other in close quarters. There’s no discipline or strategy; it’s mayhem, and each side hates the other, both resolved to take no prisoners.HAROLD GREEN (V.O.)
Some of us was in the Second Kansas Colored. We fought the Rebs at Jenkins’ Ferry last April, just after they’d killed every Negro soldier they captured at Poison Springs.
EXT. ANACOSTIA RIVER — PARADE GROUNDS ADJACENT TO THE WASHINGTON NAVY YARD — NIGHT (RAINING AND FOGGING)Union Army companies are camped across the grounds, preparing for the impending assault on the Confederate port of Wilmington, North Carolina.Two Black soldiers — HAROLD GREEN, an infantryman in his late thirties, and IRA CLARK, a cavalryman in his early twenties — are standing before a bivouacked Negro unit. ABRAHAM LINCOLN is sitting on a bench, facing Harold and Ira; his stovepipe hat is at his side.HAROLD GREEN (CONT’D)
So at Jenkins’ Ferry, we decided warn’t takin no Reb prisoners, and we didn’t leave a one of ’em alive. Ones of us didn’t die that day, we joined up with the One Hundred Sixteenth U.S. Colored, sir, from Camp Nelson, Kentucky.
ABRAHAM LINCOLN
What’s your name, soldier?

--

--

I write about writing and editing and also share occasional thoughts on things. mitchellferrin.com

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Mitchell Ferrin

I write about writing and editing and also share occasional thoughts on things. mitchellferrin.com