Screenplay Edit: “The Social Network”

A line-by-line edit of the first 160 words of the script.

Screenshot by the author; © 2010 by Columbia Pictures.

Original Text

FROM THE BLACK WE HEAR--MARK (V.O.)
Did you know there are more people with genius IQ’s living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?
ERICA (V.O.)
That can’t possibly be true.
MARK (V.O.)
It is.
ERICA (V.O.)
What would account for that?
MARK (V.O.)
Well, first, an awful lot of people live in China. But here’s my question:
FADE IN:INT. CAMPUS BAR - NIGHTMARK ZUCKERBERG is a sweet looking 19 year old whose lack of any physically intimidating attributes masks a very complicated and dangerous anger. He has trouble making eye contact and sometimes it’s hard to tell if he’s talking to you or to himself.ERICA, also 19, is Mark’s date. She has a girl-next-door face that makes her easy to fall for. At this point in the conversation she already knows that she’d rather not be there and her politeness is about to be tested.The scene is stark and simple.MARK
How do you distinguish yourself in a population of people who all got 1600 on their SAT’s?
ERICA
I didn’t know they take SAT’s in China.
MARK
They don’t. I wasn’t talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.
ERICA
You got 1600?
MARK
Yes. I could sing in an a Capella group, but I can’t sing.
ERICA
Does that mean you actually got nothing wrong?
MARK
I can row crew or invent a 25 dollar PC.
ERICA
Or you can get into a final club.
MARK
Or I can get into a final club.

Line Edit

FROM THE BLACK WE HEAR--
MARK (V.O.)Did you know there are more people with genius IQ’s living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?

Did you know there are more people with genius IQs living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?

ERICA (V.O.)That can’t possibly be true.
MARK (V.O.)It is.ERICA (V.O.)What would account for that?MARK (V.O.)Well, first, an awful lot of people live in China.But here’s my question:FADE IN:INT. CAMPUS BAR — NIGHT

INT. HARVARD UNIVERSITY — CAMPUS BAR — NIGHT

INT. HARVARD UNIVERSITY — BAR — NIGHT

MARK ZUCKERBERG is a sweet looking 19 year old whose lack of any physically intimidating attributes masks a very complicated and dangerous anger.

MARK ZUCKERBERG is a sweet-looking nineteen-year-old whose lack of physically intimidating attributes masks a complicated and dangerous anger.

He has trouble making eye contact and sometimes it’s hard to tell if he’s talking to you or to himself.

He has trouble making eye contact, and sometimes it’s hard to tell if he’s talking to you or to himself.

ERICA, also 19, is Mark’s date.

ERICA ALBRIGHT, also nineteen, is Mark’s date.

She has a girl-next-door face that makes her easy to fall for.At this point in the conversation she already knows that she’d rather not be there and her politeness is about to be tested.

At this point in the conversation, she already knows that she’d rather not be here, and her politeness is about to be tested.

The scene is stark and simple.
MARK

MARK (CONT’D)

How do you distinguish yourself in a population of people who all got 1600 on their SATs?

How do you distinguish yourself in a population of students who all got sixteen hundred on their SATs?

ERICAI didn’t know they take SATs in China.MARKThey don’t. I wasn’t talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.

They don’t; I wasn’t talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.

ERICAYou got sixteen hundred?MARKYes.I could sing in an a Capella group, but I can’t sing.

I could sing in an a cappella group, but I can’t sing.

ERICADoes that mean you actually got nothing wrong?MARK

MARK (CONT’D)

I can row crew or invent a twenty-five dollar PC.

I could row crew or invent a twenty-five-dollar PC.

ERICAOr you could get into a final club.MARKOr I could get into a final club.

Edited Text

MARK (V.O.)
Did you know there are more people with genius IQs living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?
ERICA (V.O.)
That can’t possibly be true.
MARK (V.O.)
It is.
ERICA (V.O.)
What would account for that?
MARK (V.O.)
Well, first, an awful lot of people live in China. But here’s my question:
FADE IN:INT. HARVARD UNIVERSITY — BAR — NIGHTMARK ZUCKERBERG is a sweet-looking nineteen-year-old whose lack of physically intimidating attributes masks a complicated and dangerous anger. He has trouble making eye contact, and sometimes it’s hard to tell if he’s talking to you or to himself.ERICA ALBRIGHT, also nineteen, is Mark’s date. She has a girl-next-door face that makes her easy to fall for. At this point in the conversation, she already knows that she’d rather not be here, and her politeness is about to be tested.MARK (CONT’D)
How do you distinguish yourself in a population of students who all got sixteen hundred on their SATs?
ERICA
I didn’t know they take SATs in China.
MARK
They don’t; I wasn’t talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.
ERICA
You got sixteen hundred?
MARK
Yes. I could sing in an a cappella group, but I can’t sing.
ERICA
Does that mean you actually got nothing wrong?
MARK (CONT’D)
I could row crew or invent a twenty-five-dollar PC.
ERICA
Or you could get into a final club.
MARK
Or I could get into a final club.

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I write about writing and editing and also share occasional thoughts on things. mitchellferrin.com

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Mitchell Ferrin

I write about writing and editing and also share occasional thoughts on things. mitchellferrin.com